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In the mood for something cheesy, I hit the local video rental area in search of an entertainingly-bad cult b-flick. ‘The Thing With Two Heads’ DVD had impartial recently hit the shelves, so I decided to choose a gamble on it. I’d never seen it before, and until now it was almost impossible to pick up on video. Fortunately, I was in for a treat- it is indeed as comic and corny as I’d hoped it’d be!
A unfamiliar mix of panic, medical drama, blaxploitation, sci-fi, and chase/suspense, ‘The Thing…’ can’t quite figure out exactly what it wants to be. Never the less, this small confusion is what adds to the movie’s cheesy charm. Then of course there’s the not-so-special effects: check out the scenes with the two-headed gorilla and our double-noggined marquee man as he (they? ) outrun the cops on a dirt bike!
Grier & Ray Milland’s on-screen chemistry worked about as well as oil & water, which would be an absolute pains were this a top-notch flick. But here, it’s practically a necessity! Also, if you wanna experience the most incompetent police force since the Keystone Kops & the trashing of more fuzz cars than you’d witness in an entire season of ‘The Dukes of Hazzard’, then the climactic dart scene through a grassy Southern California valley will surely get your day!
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‘Late
Have you ever wondered how frosty it would be to have a second head grafted on your body, honest next to yours? I have, and so has Hollywood, the land of candy cane dreams and pennywhistle fantasies. Now I know some will say, ‘Why do we need another two headed freak type movie? We’ve already got two entries in the `two-headed man’ genre with The Manster (1962) and The Fantastic 2-Headed Transplant (1971) .’ And I might agree, if not for the fact that neither of those two films really deals with the social ramifications that the AIP release of The Thing with Two Heads (1972) touches on, specifically what happens when you graft the head of a white bigot’s head on a soul brother’s body, the consequences being pure cinematic gold (well, okay, maybe not, but it’s obvious fun to explore) .
The Thing with Two Heads was directed by Lee Frost, who also gave us such lurid exploitation pictures as The House on Bare Mountain (1962), The Defilers (1965), and Policewomen (1974) and stars Oscar winning actor Ray Milland (no, he didn’t score the award for this film, but for the 1945 film The Lost Weekend) and archaic L.A. Rams football player Roosevelt `Rosey’ Grier. With respect to Milland, it certainly is fascinating, even a bit sunless, to eye a once astronomical star wallow uncomfortably in number of trashy 70’s B pics like this or Frogs (1972), objective to name a few.
As the film starts, we are introduced to Dr. Maxwell Kirshner (Milland), a highly successful surgeon who runs a number of clinics specializing in human transplants. We also learn that Maxwell is terminally ill, and is conducting a secret experiment in his basement, one designed specifically in mind with the possibility of saving his life. If you guess it has something to do with transplanting his head onto another body, you’d be accurate. The experiment involves grafting a second head onto a gorilla (played by Oscar winning special effects makeup artist Rick Baker), and then removing the modern head, seeing if the newly grafted head survives. The process takes about a month, allowing for the second head to grow strong enough assuming control of the host body. There’s a ravishing humorous scene when the gorilla escapes, and terrorizes a convenience store before being recaptured.
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Anyway, the gorilla experiment is a success, opening the door for a human head transplant, but Maxwell’s condition is deteriorating fast, and he soon goes into a coma, but not before instructing his subordinates to follow through with his plans. Only spot is a compatible host/donor body is extremely difficult to approach by…until inquires are made with the prison board, and a likely candidate is found in a supposedly wrongfully convicted murky man on death row, Jack Moss (Grier), scheduled to be executed. Jack, seeing a chance to prolong his existence for another month, allowing for him to try and pick up the only man, who went missing at the time of his trial, and could distinct him by supplying a credible alibi, accepts the deal. Thing is, Jack has no conception what’s in store for him. So what happens when both men realize what has happened? And who gets to maintain the body in the raze?
The notion here is surely lively, albeit deeply entrenched in the realm of fantasyland. I know not if this film was meant to be a serious science fiction characterize or not, but given the smattering of comedy throughout, I am assuming the latter. Most of the truly comical scenes advance from the situations arising after the surgical plot, and Milland’s character’s expounding of bigoted statements. Racism in and of itself certainly isn’t comic, but the level stupidity within Milland’s character and his lack of control over the state definite is…okay, the scenes where Grier is running around with a plastic head attached to his should did gaze fraudulent, but I didn’t focus on that too grand. The scene that really sort of derailed the film from being better than it was, for me, was the extended ride scene on the motorbike. It was droll for like a few minutes, but then, probably due to the skimpiness of the state, runs for remarkable longer than it should have, lasted well over 15 minutes. My current scene was when Jack and Maxwell, on the lamb as Jack is level-headed a convicted criminal, go to Jack’s girlfriend’s apartment (I adore her absolute lack of shock at seeing this irregular creature, and her utterance, `You regain into more sh$t…’), and Jack tries to launch intimacy with her, to which she expresses uneasiness with Maxwell’s head lawful there. Jack then turns to Maxwell and states, `Now you know you got to go…’
The print broken-down on this release looks really suitable, and is in wide hide format. The only special feature available is a theatrical trailer for the film, which is almost as comical as the film. Obvious, this cheese may stink, but at least it goes easy, not taking itself too seriously. One thing I did learn from this film is that when one head of a two-headed man smokes a cigarette, the smoke will actually expel from the mouth of the head not smoking…seems logical to me…and lovely humorous…
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